Anth(bro)pologie

You don't need a chaperone to walk into an Anthropologie.

You can do it all by yourself, man. And if you're dragged into the store by your lady or mom, bite your tongue, put away your phone and take a peek around. Sure, it's a white girl's haven of Pinterest-worthy finds that she pins and pins and pins away at into the wee hours in the morning. 

But they also carry a hefty amount of home and kitchen supplies with a quirky appeal that will surely bring all you snobby mid-century modern wankity wanks an upturned nose. Well, try on a beatnik hat for a change and embrace the wonderland. She could spend a while in a store, probably just as long as she could pinning and pinning and pinning away her imaginary bedroom.

We totally spend the same amount of time on fantasy football leagues, so I think we can take one for the team.

Being the quintessential friend of the quintessential Pinterest girl, I ventured into Anthropologie this past week and found a few things that you might like as well. I was actually looking for bed sheets and walked out with a candle. So, go figure this post was about to happen.

• Anthropologie can take a hint that men are filthy booze hounds: 
• Silver spoon ($7); piece of cake ($8) and horn bottle opener ($30)
• Pocket square, snot rag or fancy cloth napkin. You decide.
• Literary correspondance napkin set ($30).
• Because you're using your mason jar to drink fancy drinks out of:
• Besom holder ($70) to hold your blades and fancy pens.
• Because you already have a tin to hold your pipe tobacco:
• Classic bike repair tin kit ($14). Hey, it looks cool, and it's practical.
• The most masculine candle from a woman's store:
• Voluspa "Baltic Amber" glass jar candle ($26). No assembly required.
• Warm those hard floors a bit, yeah?
• Festival rug ($78). You can have some color in your house, I swear.

Of all the things I want or need (or think I need to want), the bottle openers catch my eye. For my first two months since relocating to Brooklyn, my bottle opener was a lighter. I just recently upgraded to a shitty four-dollar one from the local bodega. I also spent $26 on a candle and bought the one above.

Punch me or whatever, but then smell my room and you'll find that it no longer reeks of gym clothes, stale air and seasonal allergies.